Humdrum Days and Lonely Nights

I wake up every morning the same way, to the sound of the alarm on my phone sounding off. Before it can go any longer than a minute, I am hitting the snooze button and turning over to try and catch an extra 15 minutes of "sleep". I fight with my alarm for about 30 minutes and finally, literally, roll out of bed. I take a deep breath as I walk to my bathroom, turn the light on and stare at my imprinted face. I shake my head, grab my tooth brush and proceed to brush my teeth and wash my face. Once I pat my face dry, I walk out of my room toward the kitchen. As I step foot on the kitchen floor, I look over at the window and it hits me. They're not there. As my day goes on, it is a constant reminder that the life I have had for 5 years has changed and no longer will be. 

My walk home from work is a mere blur because my mind is moving so fast and consumed with the thoughts of being home. The door can't open fast enough. Once I open the door, I walk in to my hallway to again, realize that I no longer am greeted by her fuzzy little face. No longer will she be happy to see me home. 

No one could ever image that someone so small and nonhuman could make my days so worthwhile. No one could ever image that she would fill my nights and kill my loneliness. I struggle everyday to bring back meaning to my mundane and humdrum life. Grateful I am, for all that I have and all that I have in store in the future but my heart is still heavy, my heart is still empty. 

All I can do is hold on to the memories of her charismatic personality and warm, little fuzzy body in hopes that it will keep me warm at night and make my days bright. 

Til next time, 

Peaches Jones